Friday, March 12, 2010

March 7, 2010

So today was sort of informative. I went to a SIS (Special Investigative Services) meeting with Lt. Payne in regards to my case. She wanted my statement, asked some other general info about me, and about my time at camp. She said she would also run the same line of questions with my assailant, put all the info together in her report to the UDC and the Lt (who will ultimately make their decision based on information gathered), then the Warden will make the final decision on the fate of Enos and myself.

The thing that is slowing up the investigation is that there are no witnesses stepping forward. Am I really that surprised? No. Even though everyone hates this Enos guy, no one wants to be a rat. Do I blame them? No. Would I do the same in their position? Yes. The ironic thing about what I just said is that with nearly every other incident in the past, snitches ave lined up to say who, what, when, where, why things went down. Irony, suck-my-balls. So now it's up to Enos to fess up, or by some miracle, some witness to step forward - both of which I now find highly unlikely to happen.

In summation; I have many questions and few answers. A real landmark day will be the day the Lt. reads me the report because the UDC meeting will be what my future holds. As it stands, the SIS lady said expect to be here at least another month.
March 5, 2010

Last day to hear anything and I get nothing. I get to start my hope for answers all over again on Monday. This weekend is going to be very difficult on me mentally. This environment will dissect you. I can tell it will be hard to leave here feeling like my whole self. It will take an extremely strong mind to not let this place affect me, but I'm not sure how I'll fare. this will truly be my biggest test as far as my incarceration goes. It is just difficult to be positive when it feels like the deck is stacked against me. Combine that with the feelings of being helpless and trapped; I feel like I can't even stand-up for myself and fight my own battle.

Well, only thing I can thing to write on about is expressing my distaste for this system and how depressed it has made me, so I am going to stop. I will write again next week when/if I learn anything significant.
March 4, 2010

No news yet. The Lt. has been down to talk to the other inmates, but he had no news for me. He only offered one piece of advice, "Be patient, this will take awhile." My celly explained that the investigation must still be going on. This does nothing to put my mind at ease. There has to be at least 20 reports on what happened to me. There are always certain inmates attached to the C.O.'s ass like a parasite that can't live without its host. While I normally detest people like that, they are my only hope in getting the truth out to the appropriate people. This Enos guy has been manipulating and extorting other inmates for a long time. I obviously got the memo too late to make an informed decision on loaning him the stamps to begin with.

Now, the official charge against me is fighting with another inmate. Problem is, a fight constitutes two individuals coming to a physical altercation where both parties attempt to inflict bodily harm on one another. Thing of it is, I was attacked with a chicken shit cheap shot. Having said my peace and gave up on getting my stamps back. The last thing I remember is taking a full two steps backwards from Enos and turning my head down and to the right, staring at the rack full of pool balls. My jaw was fully exposed, like a big bull's-eye. That means he had to close the gap by stepping into his punch in order to bring me within his range. Again, that means I was attacked, not that I fought with him. If i had seen the punch coming, my body would have tensed up, especially my jaw and I doubt I would have actually been knocked out. The best thing going for me was that i kept a level head after coming to. I can remember the look in his eyes as he realized his mistake as he was blocking the exit to the pool room. The fire in his eyes burned holes into me preluding the punch were extinguished by eyes that pleaded with me to balance his mistake by hitting him back. If I did that, I would definitely be telling you guys I'm out of camp and that I fucked up. Like I said, I just need the truth to rise to the surface of this murky situation and I will be okay.

I am pleased with my composure during the confrontation, but I still wonder how much was composure and how much was pure shock. Still, I am grateful I didn't make any mistakes. Well, minus the innocent loaning of stamps. I just hope Friday yields some answers or hints as to what is happening. Otherwise it will be a weekend of torturing myself with "what-ifs" and "woulda, coulda, shouldas."
March 3, 2010

Sleep eludes me last night. I'm sharing an 8' x 10' cell with one other person. The steel frame bunks here are shorter than the mattress in length. I am taller than the bed length, which probably wouldn't bother me except an awkward cross bar restricts my feet from hanging over the edge and one by my head that I constantly smack against. We are only given a clean change of clothes on shower days. Hence, no way to make a makeshift pillow to achieve some level of comfort. This place makes J--1 seem like a walk in the park.

My celly tells me that first, the Lieutenant will come by to read me the charge and state the evidence to back-up the allegations against me. I should be able to offer my rebuttal at that time. The next step, I will be called into a UDC (Unit Disciplinary Committee) hearing. There, they will discuss in depth the findings of the initial investigation, hear my side, then decide what kind of recommendation to make the DHO (Disciplinary Hearing Officer). Ultimately, the DHO will make the final decision on this matter. This whole process can take months to complete, which is an extremely scary thought. Worst case: I am some how found guilty of fighting and sent to a low or medium facility with a loss of good time. Best case: I go back to camp, being found innocent of any wrong doing, but I still lose. I will lose my job, my prime bed space, and I will fail all three ACE classes. Due to not attending class. It all boils down to this: My fate rests in the witnesses coming forward to state what happened. Otherwise, it comes down to one inmates word vs. another, and I don't know how much clout I carry.

This is the last place I ever thought I would end up, and the most depressed I have ever been. U just don't know what to think anymore...
Please do not send any books or magazines to me or email me. You will understand why after reading the following posts. If you wish to write, please snail mail me at this new address:

Geoffrey Dodd #39244-086
Federal Correctional Institution
Unit: Z01-103UAD
PO Box 5000
Sheridan, OR 97378

2nd post:
March 2, 2010
So today was going like any other. It was a decent day, so I played a couple of hours of piccle ball before dinner. I came in for the 4pm census. After they count us, we are free to roam the building: watch tv, check email, play pool, etc. We can't leave the building until they call our unit (unit 5) to 'main line' (dinner).

So as usual, I go to the pool room to kill time. Right after I walked in, it was my turn to challenge the winner. As I began to rack the balls, I asked the losing opponent (my orderly boss) if I could get the three stamps back he asked to borrow weeks ago. He immediately became irate and got right in my face saying he isn't going to pay me and to fuck off. He kept yelling with his Hawaiian accent, "Whadda gon' do brah? Do something, brah!" I said, "over three stamps? I'm not fucking stupid" and I turned my attention back to the pool table. Big mistake. I woke up on the floor with the left side of my face tingling and my ears ringing. I tried to stand up but couldn't keep my balance and fell back down. The assailant, a hot-head nearly toothless douche bag Hawaiian, named Enos, is now standing over me yelling inaudibly. I attempted to stand again, this time using the table to brace myself and get my legs under me, and made my way to the door. Enos cut me off and was blocking my exit with his body. He kept saying, "Where ya goin, brah? Hit me brah." I believe it was then he realized the gravity of his mistake and was trying to bait me into turning his mindless assault into a fight, that we we both get punished. Instead I managed to push past him into the commons area. That's when it all finally sank in...I was just knocked out, over three stamps!!

I went up to my cube, put ice on my jaw and popped two aspirin. Before I knew it, four different Hawaiians came by to check on me. They each said to turn his ass in - fuck the politics of it all. "He is bad news and is making the other Hawaiians look bad with his actions." They reminded me that this attack will get him kicked out of camp permanently. All this from four of his people, whom I had never talked to nor even seen until today. I just wanted to finish icing my face and eat dinner and concluded I would deal with this after eating. Unfortunately, that thought was interrupted by a page to the admin building. I was lightly questioned, taken to medical, then asked to wait in the auditorium.

As I waited, I never could have envisioned what happened net. I was handcuffed and driven over to the S.H.U. (Special Housing Unit) or the hole as it is often called by inmates. I am still shocked at this action against me. I get attacked and now I'm being fucking punished. The SHU is 24 hour lock down, all controlled movement (meaning you never leave your cell without handcuffs), only three showers per week, fed meals in the cell, and one phone call per week (from inside the cell).

I am to understand I could be here up to 90 days while the BOP investigates and makes a decision. My only hope is that people step forward to report what they saw.

Friday, March 5, 2010

Wanna send me stuff?

This is the Western Union Quick Collect form with all the relevant information on how to put money on my books.

To send me books, magazines, or letters, use this address.

Geoffrey Dodd 39244-086

Federal Prison Camp

PO BOX 6000

Sheridan, OR 97378

If you want to mail books, send no more than three at a time, in the smallest box possible. Mark the package 'BOP APPROVED BOOKS' if you are sending them in yourself. Otherwise, you can have any online book store send them directly to me at the above address. Letters can be sent there too, but email is fine by me. If you were to send magazines, same thing applies, just mark them 'BOP APPROVED MAGAZINES', send no more than 4 at a time, in a large envelope only, and no nudey stuff. Not that I don't want them, just that I can't have them. Also, no MMA or fighting magazines. They even took away SPIKE TV so we couldn't watch the UFC fights...


Classes this week went well. I still feel behind in Ancient Civilizations because the teacher covers a different civilization every week. Otherwise, it is a great class, and I am glad I made it in. The History of WWII is simple to jump into late. It too is a great class and we get to watch video, every other week, that accompany the teacher's lecture.

I just wish the Credit Smart was as exciting as it once felt to me. The new teacher is great, but his background is in business finance and there is a separate ACE class for that topic, but I feel like he is pushing that aspect too hard too fast in CS. The original teacher was going to touch on this topic at the end of the ten weeks, talking about how credit effects your ability/inability to get a loan to start a business and some basics on running a business. It was supposed to be a nice segue for those that wanted to attend the business class, which I do want to take next round.

This new teacher is talking to us in terms and abbreviations that make it hard to keep up; as if he thinks we all have already been through business class either here or elsewhere. Myself and a few other voiced our opinions on this to him, and he took it in stride. He promised the focus will go back to the credit reports; reading, understanding, and fixing them. To play devils advocate, I know that the BOP staff quickly put this class back together, and stuck this teacher with the job knowing his background is solely in business. The teacher had 8 days to come up with an all new curriculum and only has 7 more weeks to help us achieve the goals of this class. He is a nice guy who means well and only did this because this Credit Smart class is the largest ACE class that this camp has ever had (70+ people signed up) and didn't want to leave his fellow inmates hangin.

As far as everything else, not much has happened... which is good. I would like to stay in the patterns I have established (sleeping, eating, exercising, studying, etc). While I know that they are easily broken due to the inept BOP staff here, I will relish them while I can.